Watch As I Wave My Nerd Flag

Have you ever noticed how we often discuss the idea of choice vs. an inherent “born this way” inner feeling only in terms of non-straight and non-cis identities? We always treat straight and cis as some kind of default, some kind of “natural,” some kind of built-in, innate identities while we tend to debate the innateness of any other kind of identity.  I don’t think that’s fair, and I think all sides of the GSM political and social debates do it (some more than others, obviously). 

I noticed this, most recently, on an online Wellesley forum.  There was an article posted talking about just this in terms of homosexuality.  The article never mentioned anything on the flip side of heterosexuality being a choice (which, it must be if the argument is that homosexuality is a choice, right?).   Even the comments on the Wellesley forum were focused around non-straight identities.  

Now, I’m not saying, “think of those poor straight cis people, why don’t we talk about them????”  No, that’s just all kinds of wrong and privileged.  What I’m saying is, why is it that only non-straight and non-cis identities are debated in terms of their instinctive-ness?  I just don’t get how we can debate the nature vs. nurture of non-straight & non-cis identities without also debating the nature vs. nurture of straight and cis identities.  If non-straight and non-cis are choices, doesn’t that also make being straight and/or cis a choice, as well?  Also, if being straight and/or cis is innate, wouldn’t any other gender and sexuality identity be innate as well? 

I just…ugh…I don’t get it.  I just don’t understand why we have to debate if non-straight and non-cis identities are innate or not.  And, if we’re going to examine non-normative identities, then don’t we have to examine the societal norms as well?